Why I Started the Christian Introvert Blog6 minute read
As an introvert, I often find myself in my head, pondering many different things. I seem to have more interests than a person can handle. I often have so many ideas, thoughts, desires and goals that never seem to come to fruition. I get lost in my own thoughts and honestly never share them with the world or even the people around me. I find it hard to talk to people, mainly strangers, but sometimes even those I am close too. People describe me as “quiet”. When talking to others I don’t want to get too personal, seem too weak or be too vulnerable. I don’t care for crowds and feel pretty good when I am alone.
But on the other hand, I’m a bit of a clown and a little goofy. I have a witty personality and have a sarcastic remark for just about anything. I can connect with just about anyone and I actually enjoy interacting with people. I’m the typical man when it comes to the love of beef, sports, and fishing. I‘m even the loud parent on the sidelines of my 5 years old’s soccer game (I hate losing). I can keep going on, but I’ll stop.
For the longest time, I thought there was something wrong with my personality. I didn’t know why I was so quiet while wanting to say so much. Crowds, of any sort, make me nervous. I hated the fact I had a hard time carrying a conversation and I wasn’t good at small talk, which led to a lot of awkward silence. I over think every situation and plan every possible outcome of a conversation. I have more conversations in my head than I do out loud.
I struggled for a long time trying to figure out why I was the way I was. I thought I was weird. People seemed to be happier the more outgoing they were. They seemed to have life figured out. There was a sense of direction and purpose that flowed out of the loud, outgoing type. I wanted to be like that. Why couldn’t I be like that? Why couldn’t I just speak my mind when I wanted and not care what those around me thought? I often found myself wanting to be someone else. I wasn’t happy with who I was. Not that I didn’t like myself. I just didn’t like my personality. I thought it was weak and that it held me back in life. This bothered me to the core.
As a Christian, it bothered me even more. I didn’t feel like I was a good Christian because of how my personality held me back. I was too shy to just “preach from the street corner” so to speak. I didn’t bring up Christ in every conversation and I didn’t argue with those who disagreed with Christianity. I thought after being saved I was supposed to shout from the rooftops and evangelize from a soapbox on a busy street corner or just simply walk up to total strangers and tell them about the gospel. I felt like I was letting God down by being “quiet”.
That is why I am starting the Christian Introvert Blog. That last sentence.
“I felt like I was letting God down by being quiet”.
I know now, that is simply not true! I realize now, God made me this way and I should use it as a strength. I no longer feel like the person I described above. I no longer get mad at myself for being a little more reserved at parties. I don’t want to be that outgoing popular dude that is always the center of attention. I don’t feel my life is hindered by my personality and most importantly, I no longer feel I am letting God down because I don’t quote scripture and preach the gospel to every stranger I talk too. I have finally figured out who I am and why I act the way I do.
What started this discovery? About a year ago I came across a video on YouTube. It was a TED Talk featuring Susan Cain (I don’t know if she is a Christian, but that doesn’t matter). The title was “The Power of Introverts”. Susan is the author of “Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World that Can’t Stop Talking“. I am not sure why I clicked on it, but I think it has to do with some personality test I took a few years prior and I recognized the word “introvert”. Also, I might have been on a TED Talk binge (but that’s beside the point).
Now If you watched the video, I wasn’t like Susan in the sense of liking to read. Just not my thing. But I really enjoyed that part when she spoke on people admiring the character of man in the early days of America instead of their loudness (for lack of a better term). This video really got me interested in learning more about introverts.
Remember when I said, “I seem to have more interests than a person can handle”? Well, a couple of those interests is serving and leading others. I really enjoy being able to make someone’s life a little better or a little easier. I get great satisfaction from giving advice on things I have experience with. This is where the blog comes in. I want to use this platform to encourage those who are questioning life and their purpose in it, in hopes of making your life a little better or a little easier to navigate.
I want to show Christian introverts that there is a reason for the way God molded your personality and that there is a purpose for you being here on this earth. I want you to know, you are not alone. I truly believe each person is made to do something great and I believe introverts have a special superpower in order to get that done. We just need to build a certain amount of self-awareness and get a little direction to make it happen.
Now, I am not much of a writer, as you can probably tell, but I am willing to put myself out there and get better at it, in hopes it will come across the screen of at least one person that needs it. I am no expert on the topic of introversion…. yet. But I am going to keep learning and applying.
“Don’t underestimate me because I’m quiet. I know more than I say, think more than I speak and observe more than you know.” ~ Michaela Chung
Thanks for reading and God Bless.
If you enjoyed this, you would also find “What does it Mean to be an Introvert” interesting.
For “Quiet” and other books on the topic of Introversion, go to https://christianintrovert.com/bookclub/
Travis Haines
Husband | Father | IT Guy | Blogger | Author and Creator of ChristianIntrovert.com wanting to encourage those who question their abilities in Christ. Don't let your Introversion define who you are and don't use it as an excuse to shut yourself out from the world.